Plano Divorce Lawyers Blog

From the beginning of their family law practice, the lawyers of Easley & Marquis have made the best interest of children a top priority. They have done this for good reason.

Children are the unintended victims of divorce. They do not ask for the divorce. They often feel pulled to take sides. Even though they love both parents, they generally do not want to choose one parent over the other. If asked, most children will tell you that they wish their parents would get back together.

Even adults, whose parents were divorced during their childhood, will tell you that they wish their parents had been able to get along and stay married. The desire of children for their parents to get along and stay together is true for the many families we represent, whether it's in one of the Collin County towns, such as Plano, Frisco, Allen, McKinney or Wylie, or in Dallas or Denton Counties. We feel confident the same is true for children of divorce everywhere in the country.

The negative impact of divorce on children does not always show up during the divorce. They may continue to perform well in school while the divorce is ongoing and, later, show the signs of stress and anxiety they have felt while the divorce was pending. In fact, studies have shown that the impact of divorce frequently does not show up until much later in the lives of these children. For example, children of divorce receive far less help paying for college expenses than children whose parents are not divorce, which can impact their ability to be self-sufficient adults. Other studies have shown that children of divorce do not perform as well in school,particularly in the area of mathmetics, and do not have as developed interpersonal skills as those whose parents have not been divorced

At Easley & Marquis, we encourage parents we represent, particularly those who are involved in a high conflict cutody dispute, to stay focused on the best interest of the children at all times. We show them examples of how a parent, unintentionally, can say things to a child or in the presence of a child that could be considered parental alienation.

Children love the attention of their parents and they learn quickly how to manipulate a parent with that parent's need to one-up the other parent in a custody dispute. The result often will be that the litigation becomes even more expensive and emotionally charged because now the parents are accusing each other of parental alienation. Social studies will be ordered. Everyone will be sent to counseling. The divorce process will take longer and be more expensive. No one "wins" in those situations.

Parents will continue to get divorced. Children will continue to be negatively impacted. That is not going to change. However, parents can choose to take a path, whether it be through collaborative law or just using good judgment and good behavior during the divorce, to focus honestly on what the children need rather than what serves their own purposes.