Plano Divorce Lawyers Blog

In 2011, the Texas Legislature passed multiple new bills to take effect in 2012 that aim to further protect victims of stalking or abuse, serious problem everywhere including Collin County cities, such as Plano, McKinney, Allen and Frisco, both for people who are not getting a divorce as well as those who are.

Protective Orders are signed by family law judges and fully enforceable legal tools that prevent contact between a victim and an accused abuser or stalker. Many times these protective orders are used in divorce and other family law proceedings that deal with family violence. Texas is now coming down hard on stalking and domestic violence, which is changing the face of protective orders. Research has shown that family violence and stalking are widely underreported and lead to many injuries and even deaths throughout Texas. The hope of the increased protections is to have more victims come forward so the Court can hear and grant protective orders that the police can enforce to further victim safety and security.

The most dramatic change is the length of the protective order under SB 279. Prior to 2012, protective orders could remain in effect for up to two years; now, a provision allows for life-long protective orders under certain heightened conditions.

Other protections:

The Family Pet - pets, service animals, and companion animals can now be included in protective orders. These orders can protect from the abuser removing the pet from the house. Beloved pets can be safeguarded against harm or threats of harm from the abuser.

Expanded Definition of "Dating Violence" - the new reading of SB 116, about dating violence, was changed to include new dating relationships and marriages that do not yet involve intimacy of couple. This means that violence occurring on a first date, prior to any intimacy, would now be included as dating violence for the purposes of a protective order in family violence situations.

Victims of Sexual Assault - previously, for a sexual assault victim to get a protective order against an attacker, the victim had to show that he or she is in fear of further harm from the alleged attacker. Under the new law, the only requirement is finding reasonable grounds that the applicant is the victim of sexual assault at the hands of the alleged attacker. The new law states that no additional requirement of fear of future harm is necessary for a protective order to be issues. Thus, the new law also protects individuals who were the victim of certain random attacks.

Stalking Victims - the new law provides that the Court must find reasonable grounds to believe the applicant is the victim of stalking. Previously, for a victim to receive a protective order against an alleged stalker, the applicant also had to prove that he or she has been the victim of sexual assault or domestic abuse. Stalking, alone, now rises to the level of gaining a protective order.

Hearsay - most family lawyers have heard the common "hearsay" objection that limits the evidence allowed into court. Generally, a person cannot testify to what another person, who is not the other party, said outside of court. The new protective order laws broaden the scope of the allowable evidence so that certain individuals are permitted to testify to what others observe and tell them about. For example, if a child witnesses a parent abused by another parent and tells an adult, that adult can now testify as to what the child said.

Family violence and stalking are difficult for outsiders to recognize and even harder for victims to report. The Texas Legislature's vast expansion of the protections provided are in place to encourage victims and loved ones to seek help from such abuse. Many times, even in a population of educated and high income professionals, such as in Collin County, these issues come up during a separation or divorce. Protective orders are designed to protect victims of domestic abuse and family violence. If you or a loved one is suffering from such abuse, contact an experienced family law attorney about your options and rights under the law.

What's New in Grey Divorces?
Research now shows that one in four people getting divorced is over age 50, up from one in ten in 1990. Why the shift in older couples opting for divorce? Some researchers believe that the changes that occur with the shifting into a new lifestyle for retirement may cause the increased numners. As more and more baby boomers are retiring, they are also divorcing due to new problems that arise in redifining themselves outside of their careers. This appears to be especially difficult on spouses who stayed home during the day while the other spouse worked, as now both parties have someone else disrupting their routine.

Another likely cause in the increase of divorce of this population is the increase in overall divorces in the general population. With a higher rate of overall divorces, the over 50 group now sees that divorce is not quite the "social disgrace" that it was considered when they first married. Other research shows that the old adage of men leaving for younger women is not the major cause of the increased divorce rate. Rather, women, who are more empowered and financially independent than ever, are now able to walk away from their spouses for any number of reasons. This is something they would not have done in the past due to the high personal and financial costs.

Furthermore, the chances for divorce in this age group increase, as with the general population, if one or both spouses have previously been divorced. Those who have been divorced in the past know they will be able to survive a divorce since they have done it before.

So, What's the Difference?
1. Finding a New Mate
SInce the ratio of women to men increases with age, men have an easier time finding single women to remarry, while women, conversely, have a more difficult time finding a potential mate at an advanced age.

2. Money Matters
Divorce can devastate both parties' savings and retirement accounts. This is especially important for the over 50 crowd, who have likely accumulated more in those accounts. Divorce over 50 may change retirement plans and options for both spouses, while they are entering a more expensive time in their lives. However, those in their 50s (and older) can look forward to better health through an older age than those just a decade before them; so, many are willing and able to remain in the working world and live emotionally and finacially stable lives after the major changes that come with divorce.

Another financial issue to consider when ending a lengthy marriage is contractual alimony. The spousal maintenance laws in Texas have changed, so talk to an experienced and knowledgeable family law attorney about the possibilities and likelihood of paying or receiving spousal maintenance and alimony in your situation.

3. Children are Still a Consideration
Parents who divorce later in life may believe their adult children will not be affected by the changes. However, divorce and remarriage cause many different concerns for children of all ages. Be prepared to discuss openly how a divorce will affect inheritances. Also, adult children may fear that their own marriage may not survive or that their whole life is built on a sham. These are issues that require quite a different approach and process than divorces that involve younger children. Regardless of the age of children whose parents are divorcing, the divorce will have an impact on them.

4. Caretakers
Older people also need to think about who will take care of them or help them as they continue to age, particularly if their health declines. Are there financial means to pay others to assist children with this burden? Are there children willing and able to help? These are questions that a person contemplating divorce at a later stage of life need to consider carefully.

5. Emotional Well-Being
Divorcing later in life, especially after a long marriage, can be much more difficult than earlier divorces. Counseling is recommended. There are also many websites devoted to helping those going through a "grey" divorce. Whether the problems are adult children, financial issues, loneliness, finding yourself, or almost anything else, there is a good chance that a support group exists or will soon be emerging to help the growing number of newly single people over the age of 50.

Are you one of the growing population of Collin County residents over 50 and contemplating divorce? Keep these few things in mind:

a. Gather your financial records and visit with a financial planner or advisor. Make sure you know how about your joint and separate assets and liabilities, so you can make fully informed decisions.

b. Meet with experienced family law attorneys who understand the difficulties that arise with years of compiled emotions, property, etc. These attorneys will better help you decide what type of divorce fits your needs best: collaborative, contested, or uncontested divorce.

c. Have a support network ready to help you through this, whether it is a formal support group, friends and family, or both.

Remember, ending any marriage, especially a long marriage, is something you should not do lightly. Think over this decision and the affects it may have on your emotional and financial well being and that of your family; consult professional counselors, advisors, and attorneys; and take some solace in knowing that you are not the first in this age group to endure these hardships.