Plano Divorce Lawyers Blog

In 2011, the Texas Legislature passed multiple new bills to take effect in 2012 that aim to further protect victims of stalking or abuse, serious problem everywhere including Collin County cities, such as Plano, McKinney, Allen and Frisco, both for people who are not getting a divorce as well as those who are.

Protective Orders are signed by family law judges and fully enforceable legal tools that prevent contact between a victim and an accused abuser or stalker. Many times these protective orders are used in divorce and other family law proceedings that deal with family violence. Texas is now coming down hard on stalking and domestic violence, which is changing the face of protective orders. Research has shown that family violence and stalking are widely underreported and lead to many injuries and even deaths throughout Texas. The hope of the increased protections is to have more victims come forward so the Court can hear and grant protective orders that the police can enforce to further victim safety and security.

The most dramatic change is the length of the protective order under SB 279. Prior to 2012, protective orders could remain in effect for up to two years; now, a provision allows for life-long protective orders under certain heightened conditions.

Other protections:

The Family Pet - pets, service animals, and companion animals can now be included in protective orders. These orders can protect from the abuser removing the pet from the house. Beloved pets can be safeguarded against harm or threats of harm from the abuser.

Expanded Definition of "Dating Violence" - the new reading of SB 116, about dating violence, was changed to include new dating relationships and marriages that do not yet involve intimacy of couple. This means that violence occurring on a first date, prior to any intimacy, would now be included as dating violence for the purposes of a protective order in family violence situations.

Victims of Sexual Assault - previously, for a sexual assault victim to get a protective order against an attacker, the victim had to show that he or she is in fear of further harm from the alleged attacker. Under the new law, the only requirement is finding reasonable grounds that the applicant is the victim of sexual assault at the hands of the alleged attacker. The new law states that no additional requirement of fear of future harm is necessary for a protective order to be issues. Thus, the new law also protects individuals who were the victim of certain random attacks.

Stalking Victims - the new law provides that the Court must find reasonable grounds to believe the applicant is the victim of stalking. Previously, for a victim to receive a protective order against an alleged stalker, the applicant also had to prove that he or she has been the victim of sexual assault or domestic abuse. Stalking, alone, now rises to the level of gaining a protective order.

Hearsay - most family lawyers have heard the common "hearsay" objection that limits the evidence allowed into court. Generally, a person cannot testify to what another person, who is not the other party, said outside of court. The new protective order laws broaden the scope of the allowable evidence so that certain individuals are permitted to testify to what others observe and tell them about. For example, if a child witnesses a parent abused by another parent and tells an adult, that adult can now testify as to what the child said.

Family violence and stalking are difficult for outsiders to recognize and even harder for victims to report. The Texas Legislature's vast expansion of the protections provided are in place to encourage victims and loved ones to seek help from such abuse. Many times, even in a population of educated and high income professionals, such as in Collin County, these issues come up during a separation or divorce. Protective orders are designed to protect victims of domestic abuse and family violence. If you or a loved one is suffering from such abuse, contact an experienced family law attorney about your options and rights under the law.

What's New in Grey Divorces?
Research now shows that one in four people getting divorced is over age 50, up from one in ten in 1990. Why the shift in older couples opting for divorce? Some researchers believe that the changes that occur with the shifting into a new lifestyle for retirement may cause the increased numners. As more and more baby boomers are retiring, they are also divorcing due to new problems that arise in redifining themselves outside of their careers. This appears to be especially difficult on spouses who stayed home during the day while the other spouse worked, as now both parties have someone else disrupting their routine.

Another likely cause in the increase of divorce of this population is the increase in overall divorces in the general population. With a higher rate of overall divorces, the over 50 group now sees that divorce is not quite the "social disgrace" that it was considered when they first married. Other research shows that the old adage of men leaving for younger women is not the major cause of the increased divorce rate. Rather, women, who are more empowered and financially independent than ever, are now able to walk away from their spouses for any number of reasons. This is something they would not have done in the past due to the high personal and financial costs.

Furthermore, the chances for divorce in this age group increase, as with the general population, if one or both spouses have previously been divorced. Those who have been divorced in the past know they will be able to survive a divorce since they have done it before.

So, What's the Difference?
1. Finding a New Mate
SInce the ratio of women to men increases with age, men have an easier time finding single women to remarry, while women, conversely, have a more difficult time finding a potential mate at an advanced age.

2. Money Matters
Divorce can devastate both parties' savings and retirement accounts. This is especially important for the over 50 crowd, who have likely accumulated more in those accounts. Divorce over 50 may change retirement plans and options for both spouses, while they are entering a more expensive time in their lives. However, those in their 50s (and older) can look forward to better health through an older age than those just a decade before them; so, many are willing and able to remain in the working world and live emotionally and finacially stable lives after the major changes that come with divorce.

Another financial issue to consider when ending a lengthy marriage is contractual alimony. The spousal maintenance laws in Texas have changed, so talk to an experienced and knowledgeable family law attorney about the possibilities and likelihood of paying or receiving spousal maintenance and alimony in your situation.

3. Children are Still a Consideration
Parents who divorce later in life may believe their adult children will not be affected by the changes. However, divorce and remarriage cause many different concerns for children of all ages. Be prepared to discuss openly how a divorce will affect inheritances. Also, adult children may fear that their own marriage may not survive or that their whole life is built on a sham. These are issues that require quite a different approach and process than divorces that involve younger children. Regardless of the age of children whose parents are divorcing, the divorce will have an impact on them.

4. Caretakers
Older people also need to think about who will take care of them or help them as they continue to age, particularly if their health declines. Are there financial means to pay others to assist children with this burden? Are there children willing and able to help? These are questions that a person contemplating divorce at a later stage of life need to consider carefully.

5. Emotional Well-Being
Divorcing later in life, especially after a long marriage, can be much more difficult than earlier divorces. Counseling is recommended. There are also many websites devoted to helping those going through a "grey" divorce. Whether the problems are adult children, financial issues, loneliness, finding yourself, or almost anything else, there is a good chance that a support group exists or will soon be emerging to help the growing number of newly single people over the age of 50.

Are you one of the growing population of Collin County residents over 50 and contemplating divorce? Keep these few things in mind:

a. Gather your financial records and visit with a financial planner or advisor. Make sure you know how about your joint and separate assets and liabilities, so you can make fully informed decisions.

b. Meet with experienced family law attorneys who understand the difficulties that arise with years of compiled emotions, property, etc. These attorneys will better help you decide what type of divorce fits your needs best: collaborative, contested, or uncontested divorce.

c. Have a support network ready to help you through this, whether it is a formal support group, friends and family, or both.

Remember, ending any marriage, especially a long marriage, is something you should not do lightly. Think over this decision and the affects it may have on your emotional and financial well being and that of your family; consult professional counselors, advisors, and attorneys; and take some solace in knowing that you are not the first in this age group to endure these hardships.

Alimony in Texas has changed, morphed, been completely transformed in some of its most essential traits. In various aspects, it is barely recognizable since the changes became law on September 1, 2011.

Historically, the State of Texas disliked and discouraged alimony, which also goes by the nickname of "spousal support," and more formally -- "maintenance." The general rule was that former spouses should not be required to support one another after a divorce is final. But, in the event that exes were required to support each other, the alimony should not last very long.

It was not uncommon for a new client to walk in the door and announce, with either a relieved or a frustrated look in their eyes, that they know there is no such thing as alimony in Texas. I would start by saying, "Actually,..." and then rattle off the old rules:

1. With a few exceptions, you have to have been married for 10 years to be eligible;
2. The maximum payment is $2,500 per month; and
3. The longest that alimony can last, with the perfunctory few exceptions, of course, is 3 years.

Quickly thereafter, I would explain that even if you meet the requirements, alimony is still ordered very infrequently.

Allow me to give you a brief introduction to the alimony of the future, AKA alimony on steroids:

1. With a few exceptions, you have to have been married for 10 years to be eligible;
2. The maximum payment is $5,000 per month; and
3. The longest that alimony can last, with the proverbial few exceptions, ... DEPENDS!

If you have been married for more than 10 years, but less than 20 years, alimony can last five years.

If you have been married for more than 20 years, but less than 30 years, alimony can last seven years.

If you have been married for more than 30 years, alimony can last for as many as 10 years.

Some of the exceptions that can affect the general rules are when there has been family violence and when a spouse or child has a disability.

Other changes in alimony law include when and how it can be modified, terminated and enforced.

Even when a spouse is eligible to receive alimony, there are still many facts that affect whether it will actually be awarded. Those facts include things like whether the recipient spouse needs financial support, whether the payor spouse can afford to pay it, and whether the recipient will walk away from the divorce with sufficient funds or assets to make ends meet.

The biggest change is the new emphasis on the equities involved as they relate to the length of the marriage and the de-emphasizing of alimony's function as very short-term financial aid.

Alimony has always been, and it appears that it will continue to be, a very fact-intensive issue. The law, which is set out in Chapter 8 of the Texas Family Code, is filled with many more details than can be included here. And this commentary on some of the changes made by the legislature is just that -- a commentary, and is certainly not intended as legal advice.

Kelly Hurt

Among the many issues facing divorcing parents is how or when passport issues might affect them and their child in the future. Until recently, the children's passports were often an overlooked issue in Texas divorces. Because of the increase in international travel, international marriages and the security issues presented by international marriages, the isssuance and maintaing of passports for children has become a much more important consideration. Experienced family law attorneys, particularly those in a high-tech area such as Plano, are mindful of the unique situations that can arise with passports and strive to educate parents on these issues.

Plano family attorneys advise divorcing and divorced parents about carefully considering international travel and what safeguards a parent wants in place when international travel is being contemplated. More significantly, however, is that the obtaining and use of passports has become a huge issue due to international child abduction. With international marriages increasing in number, the number of divorces among international citizens is also increasing. When international citizens are involved in a divorce, passport issues can become a critical element in preventing a parent from hiding the children in a foreign country, particularly one that is not a member of the Hague Convention.

The 1980 Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction is an important agreement in protecting parents and children who have or could become victims of international abduction. This international child custody agreement sets forth procedures and requirements to aid in the return of children who are wrongfully removed from a country. These procedures help simplify and expedite the process of getting children back.

A list of countries that have signed the Hague agreement can be found here. Eighty-Five countries have signed the agreement. However, some countries that might be expected to sign have not. For example, Japan is one country that has not signed the Hague agreement. The New York Times reports that the Japanese cabinet is now taking steps toward getting the proper legislation in place to sign the agreement, but the actual signing may take a while.

Divorcing parents need to be mindful of which countries have signed the Hague agreement because, without the procedures and requirements set forth in the Hague agreement, a child might never be returned. Our Plano family law attorneys are mindful of the Hague agreement and help divorcing and divorced parents understand these complex passport issues so that parents can make the best decisions for the safety and welfare of their children.

Child custody disputes are difficult enough without the added complication of the threat of a parent taking the child out of the country, particularly to a country that has not signed the Hague agreement. Our attorneys routinely include language in a custody agreement or custody order that provides for the conditions under which a passport for a child will be obtained, how and by whom it will be maintained and the procedure for one parent being permitted to have possession of the passport so the child can travel internationally. If the custody dispute includes a concern that a parent could remove the child from the United States to a country not a member of the Hague Convention, a family law court can and should order special provisions that give added protection for the child.

From the beginning of their family law practice, the lawyers of Easley & Marquis have made the best interest of children a top priority. They have done this for good reason.

Children are the unintended victims of divorce. They do not ask for the divorce. They often feel pulled to take sides. Even though they love both parents, they generally do not want to choose one parent over the other. If asked, most children will tell you that they wish their parents would get back together.

Even adults, whose parents were divorced during their childhood, will tell you that they wish their parents had been able to get along and stay married. The desire of children for their parents to get along and stay together is true for the many families we represent, whether it's in one of the Collin County towns, such as Plano, Frisco, Allen, McKinney or Wylie, or in Dallas or Denton Counties. We feel confident the same is true for children of divorce everywhere in the country.

The negative impact of divorce on children does not always show up during the divorce. They may continue to perform well in school while the divorce is ongoing and, later, show the signs of stress and anxiety they have felt while the divorce was pending. In fact, studies have shown that the impact of divorce frequently does not show up until much later in the lives of these children. For example, children of divorce receive far less help paying for college expenses than children whose parents are not divorce, which can impact their ability to be self-sufficient adults. Other studies have shown that children of divorce do not perform as well in school,particularly in the area of mathmetics, and do not have as developed interpersonal skills as those whose parents have not been divorced

At Easley & Marquis, we encourage parents we represent, particularly those who are involved in a high conflict cutody dispute, to stay focused on the best interest of the children at all times. We show them examples of how a parent, unintentionally, can say things to a child or in the presence of a child that could be considered parental alienation.

Children love the attention of their parents and they learn quickly how to manipulate a parent with that parent's need to one-up the other parent in a custody dispute. The result often will be that the litigation becomes even more expensive and emotionally charged because now the parents are accusing each other of parental alienation. Social studies will be ordered. Everyone will be sent to counseling. The divorce process will take longer and be more expensive. No one "wins" in those situations.

Parents will continue to get divorced. Children will continue to be negatively impacted. That is not going to change. However, parents can choose to take a path, whether it be through collaborative law or just using good judgment and good behavior during the divorce, to focus honestly on what the children need rather than what serves their own purposes.

Social networking sites can be a divorce lawyer's best friend or worst enemy, depending on who is doing the posting and who the custody lawyer represents. Our Collin County family lawyers are very familiar with the difficulties presented by postings on sites such as Facebook, Twitter, etc. An example of such a situation is a case recently handled by Easley & Marquis.

The parents were divorcing and the mother claimed that the father drank too much so he should not have unsupervised access to his child. The father claimed that he never drank any more and that the child would be safe with him. Just before the temporary orders hearing, a friend of the father posted a picture on her Facebook page of the father with several other individuals at a bar, holding a beer, bragging about how he could handle his liquor! Easley & Marquis represented the mother in this case and used the Facebook post to catch the father in a lie.

Another instance, where Easley & Marquis represented a Plano father who was seeking custody of his son, occurred when the father learned of the mother's affair because she posted pictures of herself with her "friend" on her own blog site. She thought the post was private but one of her friends showed it to the father. He got custody of the child. The moral of the story is not that, if you are getting divorced or you are already divorced, don't run around and don't drink!! The moral is DON'T POST IT ON FACEBOOK or any other social networking site.

According to the NY Daily News in their article titled, Marriage over? Divorce Lawyer Says Facebook Is Used in 90 Percent of Cases, Facebook pages and postings on other social networking sites are used as evidence in approximately 90% of divorce cases--making the lawyers job much easier--or more difficult, depending on the side the attorney represents.